Stay positive age is just a number. Right?

I always thought that turning 25 would be fun, that I would have everything tied up in a neat little bow. HAHA well that never happened.

I have scoured the internet looking for tips and things to achieve by the age of 25, (or at least things I should apparently know.) I have a few months left before the big day arrives and I become a quarter of a century old. I am intrigued to see if they will bring me ‘enlightenment’ or if I will still feel as depressed as when Rachel turned 30 in friends.

You should know that your parents are cooler now than they were ten years ago.

Back when you’re growing up, you probably used to fight and argue with your parents as much as I did. The relationship we form with our mum and dad in our early twenties is different now. Respect that they are getting older and cherish every moment you’ve got with them while they’re still here because they won’t be around forever.

You should know that staying in is as fun as staying out. (This one I can definitely relate to, I am very partial to Netflix)

Gone were the days where we dream of going out every weekend, get high and wasted and probably winding up in an unknown place the next morning. Turning 25 means that you’ve had your time for that sort of fun and it’s now time to unwind and chill out with a glass of wine without having someone thinking you’re uncool.

You should know the importance of saying no. (Can I say NO to turning 25?)

You don’t have to say yes to everything and turning 25 means you’ve got that figured out. If you’re tired on a Friday night after a long week at work and all you want to do is just curl up in bed with a good book, say no to Friday night drinks. Life can be more fulfilling if you do things for yourself instead of what people expect you to and you’re old enough to know that.

You should know that it’s okay to be selfish. (Haha tell that to my boss!)

To a certain extent, especially if it’s your happiness that’s in the equation. You should be doing things today that make you happy and contented rather than sad and annoyed. Give peer pressure a tosser and start doing something good for yourself.

You should know that money can be a serious issue if not handled properly. (This can be true but nothing beats my Vivienne Westwood handbag!)

Money is one of those thing that was not taught in school, and the only way to learn how to handle it is through experience. Turning 25 means we know how to deal with it, perhaps better than we ever did in our early twenties, and that’s a thing to celebrate.

You should know the meaning of responsible drinking, not just for yourself, but also for others. (I think I am still working on this one! Hangovers are now cured by knowing my mum won’t moan at me to get out of bed!)

Turning 25 means you know your limits and you’re wise enough to stay at it. Gone are the days where you drink as though it’s the last night of your life. You should understand too that drinking responsibly does not only affect you, but the people around you, something you probably didn’t know at 21.

You should know that it’s okay to be single too.

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Stop crying your heart out if you’re 25 and still single. You’re still awesome. Think about it, you get to meet people. You get to go out there and experience life without needing to consult anyone. And you get a whole big bed to yourself. It’s important to get to know yourself before someone steps in. That’s an experience in itself, so get out there—the whole world is waiting for you.

IF YOU CAN’T LOVE YOURSELF HOW THE HELL ARE YOU GUNNA LOVE SOMEBODY ELSE. CAN I GET AN AMEN!

AND THEN …………………..

LOVE LOVE LOVE

You should know that it’s okay to want a relationship but know that it takes work.

Does watching your best friend get married make you feel left out? It’s human to want someone to love and to accept us the way we want them to. But turning 25 means we know that having a relationship is more than just a feeling. It takes work—lots of it, and you know that love won’t just come knocking at your door when you’re staying in on a Sunday. You have to get out there and look for it.

Don't know why they call it heartbreak when your whole body hurts

OH SHIT!!!!!!!

You should know that heartbreaks are painful, and what to do about them.

It doesn’t have to be about a relationship or that day you broke up with your ex and it took you 365 days to get over it. It could be a loss of friendship or someone dear to you. It could be losing lots of money or having the insurance company deny your claim. Whatever it is, we should have all experience heartbreaks in one way or another—and it is painful. The good thing is, turning 25 means we’ve gathered enough experience to learn from those painful moments. Should anything like that happen again in the future, we know what to do, even if it means lying in bed all day just to get over it.

You should know that life is too short to worry all the time.

Turning 25 can be quite a scary thing for some of you. You sit there, a few weeks before your birthday, thinking, “Where have all the years gone?” Let me just say that it has gone by and whether we like it or not, we can’t turn back time. So stop worrying, start loving and appreciating future moments because life is too short for unnecessary things like this.

I read somewhere recently that when researchers asked twelve hundred elderly people what they had most regretted in life, they were expecting dramatic stories about addictions, adultery, failed relationships or bad business deals. But the truth turned out to be very different as most of them answered the question with one simple line “I wish I had worried less about all the small and unimportant things in my life”. So remember this when you are worrying and stressing about something; ask yourself the question if in 5 years it would really still matter! And if not, just let it go, let it flow and most of all…. Don't Worry, Be Happy  - Dutchess Roz

I think thats enough for me to be trying to get my own head round. I need to focus on the final one before any of the other things can start to happen (or repeat themselves.)

Focus for the weekend, have fun, relax and make sure I am on top of everything so I can kick ass at work!

XOXO

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How to grow confidence – is it possible in a few simple steps?

  
Women in particular struggle with confidence. They often are less adept at moving forward after setbacks, reading temporary failures as permanent deficiencies, and they often have smaller professional social safety nets than men.

The good news is that confidence can be learned, like any career skill. Here are 10 steps that can have you operating from a place of power:

1) When in doubt, act. It’s the difference between running and stagnant water. When you’re stagnant, doubt and insecurities breed like mosquitoes. Dale Carnegie wrote that “inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.” Fear of failure can paralyze us, as we almost always overestimate the consequences. Build your confidence instead by taking action, often.

2) Do something outside your comfort zone each day. If we don’t stretch our comfort zones, they shrink. Constantly challenge and improve yourself, and you’ll become comfortable doing new things—and you will establish your identity (both to yourself and others) as someone who takes risks. Each new thing you try adds to your knowledge and skill base, and provides you with a foundation of competence. This is the bedrock of any successful career.

3) Put the focus on others. Choose to be conscious of others instead of self-conscious. Ask people questions. Turn conversations into a game where you try to find a connection with the other person. Give compliments generously, and volunteer to help others when you can. Looking for the best in others will help you see it in yourself.

4) Cultivate mentors. Their advice and connections are invaluable, plus you will make better decisions about opportunities thanks to their objective assessments of the pros and cons. And you will be much more willing to take risks knowing you have supporters who will help you get back up on your feet if you fail.

5) Keep self-talk positive. It’s hard to feel confident if someone puts you down all the time. It’s impossible if that naysayer is you. Watch how you talk to yourself. Is it how you would talk to a friend? If not, then make a change.

6) Eliminate negative people from your network. You absolutely need to invite and be receptive to constructive criticism if you want to grow as a professional and as an individual. But recognize that some people will never be happy with you or with life, and it is a waste of time to try to convince them of your worth. What’s more, their sour outlook on life is contagious. Learn to identify these people quickly, and move on.

  
7) Take care of your health. Make time for exercise, and get enough rest. Your body must be physically ready to take on challenges.

8) Do your homework. Keep up-to-date on the news in your industry, and know your company and department inside and out. If you have a challenging task ahead, prepare and practice in your mind. Nothing builds confidence like knowledge and preparation.

9) Watch your body language. Your posture and overall appearance affect both your mental state and how others perceive (and thus respond) to you. If you want to be a leader, you have to dress and act the part. Stand and sit up straight, make eye contact, and remember to smile. Wear the professional clothing of your industry. Eliminate the telltale signs of nervousness: excessive twitching, closed-off posturing (crossed arms and legs, hunched shoulders), and shallow breathing.

10) Practice gratitude daily. In a recent study of how successful people spend the first hour of each day, the No. 1 response was investing time in thinking about the things for which they are most grateful. Starting your day by saying “thank you” for the good in your life makes it more likely that you will approach the day’s challenges with the proper perspective.

  

Best friends – The C3PO,  R2D2 effect! 

  

Best Friends are very special people in your life. They are the first people you think about when you make plans. They are the first people you go to when you need someone to talk to. You will phone them up just to talk about nothing, or the most important things in your life. When you’re sad they will try their hardest to cheer you up. They give the best hugs in the world! They are the shoulder to cry on, because you know that they truly care about you. In most cases they would take a bullet for you, coz it would be too painful to watch you get hurt. 

  
2 Girl best friends: They do all the girly things together, no one says anything. 
2 Boy best friends: They do all the boy stuff together, no one says anything. 
1 Boy + 1 Girl best friends: They do boy and girl stuff, People says lots of stuff

  
Look at Stu and Miss they are wicked best friends, he must fancy her coz boys and girls can’t just be best friends………. Will see. 

  

Sometimes it will sting! 

  

Watching Rupaul and his fabulous #dragrace and I can’t help but wonder what would the world be like if we did all speak our minds! 

 
Crazy and without meaning! Nothing more than a blur, a smudge, head so empty because it’s filled with emotional knocks and slices! 

Words hurt and if you think otherwise your wrong!! If your prepared maybe they will just sting a little less! 

An Open Letter To All Of My Friends Who Take Selfies

Makes me want to take more! Thank you for cheering me up! Sometimes it’s refreshing to see someone else’s take on something that is such a controversial talking point!

The Belle Jar

Dear Friends Who Take Selfies,

I want you to know that I love it when you post pictures of yourself. I know selfies get a lot of bad press, but I think they’re rad. They give me a little window into your life, and you’d be amazed at how much I can get out of one little photo.

I love your pictures because I love seeing what you’re wearing – the outfits you build give me ideas about how to mix it up with my own wardrobe, and seeing you work your shit gives me courage to try clothing that I otherwise might have thought was too outlandish or revealing.

I love seeing how you do your hair and makeup. You look like a hot babe and I wish you would make YouTube tutorials explaining how you get your eyeliner just so. I want you to post pictures every time you change your…

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White Rage, the Hunger Games, and the Lack of Justice for Eric Garner

Olivia A. Cole

eric garner

Today, like too many days, I am angry. Today a grand jury voted not to bring criminal charges against the white officer who killed Eric Garner, father of six, with a chokehold. The killing is on video, which many people hoped would mean an indictment and, eventually, a conviction. Not so. Today, America tells us once again that the value it places in black life is nil, insubstantial, nonexistent.

The protests have already begun in New York, and I’m thinking about anger, rage. I’m thinking about things that burn. When the grand jury in St. Louis County announced that it would not be indicting Darren Wilson in the killing of unarmed teenager Michael Brown, Ferguson burned. Over the weekend, I saw the latest Hunger Games film—Mockingjay—and in it, the Capitol executes unarmed civilians, their deaths broadcasted for millions of eyes. I couldn’t stop thinking about Eric…

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Can I Avoid Disaster?

Unashamed! Unsensored! Unafraid!
Finally a true voice!

The SisterWives

It is too easy to get caught up in the process, sometimes, of what we do. We forget why we started in the first place. This letter, from Sarah, arrived for us one day, and we all wondered what we might have to say to someone who was so earnestly seeking advice.

Quite a bit, it turns out. Today, we will hear from Michelle, who wrapped her arms around it in the way that only she can.

Thanks, Sarah.For reminding us.

DearSarah

I’m Sarah. I’m 23. And I was wondering if you could help me answer a few questions.

Some background: I’m working on recovering from the frighteningly non-unique mess that is childhood sexual abuse followed by self harm. And I want to be beautiful, and strong, and kind. But stereotypically, early to mid 20 something’s are kind of the opposite of all of those things. I don’t want to suck…

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It’s Not Just You

Wow great to see …….It’s not just me!!!! 😊

The Daily Dahlia

Confession: probably my biggest pet peeve on the planet is when people start a question with “Am I the only one who…?” No. You’re not. You’re not the only one who writes that way, reads that way, likes that food, likes that band, thinks Benedict Cumberbatch sounds like a Game of Thrones character or looks like someone squeezed Spongebob and stuck googly eyes on him…you’re just not. But. There’s a different kind of “Is it just me?” feeling, and that’s the stress of when you’re drowning in something and nobody’s talking about it and you feel like everyone’s got it together but you, and so you don’t wanna say a thing, and it all snowballs until you basically wanna curl up and die. I know that feeling. It’s why I wrote this post after splitting with my first agent. So in case you are wondering any of these things, I…

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